It is perhaps a mark of the modern age that I feel like I need therapy to get over how bad things are for the Dodgers right now.

I envy those who can blithely separate what’s going on in the executive offices (and the courthouse) with what’s going on on the field, enjoying the latter while ignoring the former. In fact, as badly as the Dodgers are playing, I’m not even sure how the denial thing can function right now.

If the Dodgers were winning consistently, if their budget matched up with their media market, if if if…

Instead of if, here’s a fact: the Dodgers are in last place in the NL West. The NL West, for the love of Mike. Somebody will bring up how good the pitching is across the division. Pitching, smitching — we have some of the best pitchers in the game. This is a bad division that the Dodgers should be owning.

And speaking of owning, how about that Frank McCourt?

The seemingly endless muck and mire to which the McCourts (and, let’s face it, the Selig regime by dint of having given them the team) have subjected the Dodgers is just astounding. No matter what happens next, no matter who winds up owning the historic franchise, this has been a dark time, and it’s getting darker. It makes you want to stay away from Chavez Ravine, turn off the game, and find some quiet place in which you can meditate on the important things in life. You feel dirty just paying attention.

Yesterday, ESPN Los Angeles asked (via the Dodger Thoughts blog), “Dodger fans, tell us your stories.”

Fair readers …. we at ESPNLosAngeles.com would like to hear from you about the Dodgers, and not just in the short-form comments section below. We’re asking you to submit your real-deal stories of how you became Dodger fans, what the team means to you and how recent events (um, I think you know what we mean) have affected you and that fandom.

They will be sharing some of the submissions on the website in the near future. My first contribution in the comments was,

“For sale: Manny wig, never worn.” *

A real submission from me would have to hearken back to my “Back in the day…” story, which I wrote five(!) years ago. Dodger fandom came late for me, only since about 2002-03. As I put it,

Above and beyond proximity, the Dodgers are a team with a long, rich history stretching back to the 19th century and filled with underdog heroes battling evil Giants and villainous Yankees — I’m a sucker for that kind of story.

The Dodgers and Jackie Robinson were also responsible for breaking the color barrier in the majors, and while there have been mistakes or controversy over the years (e.g. the Battle of Chavez Ravine), there have been numerous people and moments to be very proud of.

So, much in the same way a religious convert might be more fervent and motivated than someone who grew up in the church, I am once more living and dying with my (adopted) favorite team.

This was only a couple of years into the McCourt regime. If I only knew what was coming. Actually, that’s a good question: would I have changed allegiances? Would I have jumped on the 2002 Angels bandwagon? Would I have decided to skip baseball, and then with the 2004 NHL lockout have just given up again on watching sports?

Hard to say.

Thing is, it’s not just the Dodgers having issues right now. The other three major North American sports are flirting with labor disasters. Other sports I’ve followed, like pro cycling and soccer, are either tainted (literally!) or take an effort to follow outside mainstream media outlets. This is not an easy time to be a thinking, feeling sports fan. As the Great Recession continues, and world news is just bad news, what should be a welcome respite is just another depressing brouhaha.

A while back, a friend commented that she didn’t like sports and would rather be doing something than watching somebody else do them. There’s a certain truth to that, and indeed it’s usually better to be outdoors moving around and breathing than not doing those things while indoors in front of the television. Sometimes, though, you want to watch ostensibly high-skilled people perform to the best of their abilities.

So no, I don’t think I’ll give up my sports watching just yet. This is not because of some sort of “Dodgers for Life” uber-fandom, by the way. It’s just a practical thing. I have a hard enough time staying happy and productive in my real life — why should I subject myself to daily emotional beatings Just Because I’m a Fan?

Thanks, no. If that makes me not a “real fan,” then so be it. I’ve also never been a real fan of institutional flagellation either, and I’m okay with that.

This isn’t rats fleeing a sinking ship, it’s a paying passenger thinking that, since the ship appears to be sinking, it might be a good idea to double-check where the lifeboats are.

So instead of queuing up for the whipping, I think I’ll try the Safe Distance approach. Keep an eye on things, keep up on the news from the periphery. Maybe even watch a game every now and again if there’s an intriguing pitching matchup.

But I have to say, I don’t think I’ll be watching the All-Star Game this year. If the Dodgers keep losing, I won’t have to worry about watching the playoffs, either. And the World Series? Unless there’s some compelling storyline, I can’t imagine even that mainstay of mine will be watched.

What about you? Are you wallowing in the muck, reading every story, commenting willy nilly across the Web? Are you giving up on the whole thing? Or are you taking a wait-and-see approach?

Who knew sports could be so damn complicated?

I caught only a smidgen of the double header today on TV — James Loney’s justified anger at a called strike 3 and subsequent ejection, and then a bit of Charlie Haeger pitching the next half-inning.

Malaise is apparent. The Dodgers are 8-12, tied for the worst record in baseball (apart from the 4-16 Orioles). Great pitching days seem unable to coincide with great hitting days, and vice versa. If they ever put them both together, watch out.

At this point last season, the Dodgers were 14-7, winding up 15-8 at the end of April, in the midst of their record 20-0 home start and blissfully unaware of the Manny news coming May 7th. Presently, we are losing players to injuries rather than suspensions, but the season is still young. ;)

8-12 is not a death sentence by any means, nor would 8-15 be if they lose out for April. It’s one of those things: rationally, I know everything will even out eventually, and this ugly month will be a distant memory; emotionally, the thumb gets twitchy on the remote.

The problem with Juan was pretty simple: despite constant early arrivals for practice, an inspirational work ethic, and a speedy set of legs, his offensive output and defensive liabilities made the amount of money the Dodgers were paying for him unfathomable.

With the arrival of Manny Ramirez, Juan was left out in the cold, and despite a stellar month and a half of substitution last season, he still wasn’t worth how much the Dodgers were paying.

You can be a totally nice guy, a team player, and a paragon of community involvement … and still be totally over-payed during a stretch of financial inflexibility.

So, what more can we say than thanks for the help and good luck?

Not much else.

Maybe Jason Repko will finally get another chance at being the Dodgers’ 4th outfielder. He has (along with a couple of other players) the skills to equal or surpass Juan Pierre’s contribution, at several million fewer dollars. Just keep him away from Rafael Furcal. ;)

“Dear Manny,” wrote Richard MacPhee, “I am a firefighter for the USFS, I make $16 an hour. It’s hot, dirty, dangerous, with long hours. My body hurts all the time. It takes four years to make $170,000. My bonus, somebody telling me ‘Thanks for the hard work.’ You should try it some time.”

No offense to Mr. MacPhee, and thanks to him for his service, but I’ll bet Lopez makes quite a bit more than $16 an hour for doing less physically taxing labor than a member of the Dodger marketing department, much less Manny Ramirez, and whose greatest claim to fame is writing and selling somebody else’s story. As Jon Weisman pointed out,

Ramirez might well loaf from time to time, but overall his work ethic is pretty legendary. I’m not saying that to whitewash the mistakes he has made. But there is no shortage of stories about the effort he has put into the game. He did not float to the top of the baseball echelon. He’s no firefighter, but if Ramirez doesn’t work as hard as MacPhee, he still has worked plenty hard.

Barring some unlikely direct reply from Lopez, I’m letting this go for now — I’m looking forward to Game 1 tomorrow and would rather concentrate on the positives of this entire team and their amazing season. Something I wish Lopez had done himself.

I would expect more out of Steve Lopez. Unfortunately, he decided to take the easy way out. Loafing his way across the outfield, as it were.

Maybe it’s the vicodin talking, but this whole scheme strikes me as insincere. If you felt that bad about buying those tickets (and somehow calculating you were supporting Manny by doing so), how about donating those tainted tickets to be auctioned off for charity? You could even make it a steroid-awareness organization if you felt like making a real statement.

Think about how much of a bigger splash you could have made by doing things that way. You’d get all kinds of press online and in the real world. Plus you’d be making a difference about a cause that you apparently care a lot about. And getting even more of those precious hits and links.

Something to mull over in the next columnist meeting.

@MANNYWOOD: THIS IS EMBARRASING! WHAT GOT INTO ANDY LAROCHE TODAY? THE WORST DAY OF THE YEAR FOR THE #DODGERS

@trolleydodger: Umm, no. The worst day of the year for the Dodgers was 5/7/09.

It is often said that the 162-game baseball season is a marathon. By most measures, it would appear that the formerly fleet-footed Dodgers have hit the proverbial runner’s Wall. After their 121st game last night, another loss in the recent 4-6 slide, the metaphorical glycogen has been depleted something fierce.

Being a baseball fan takes a certain amount of long-term commitment. For every marathoner running their 26 miles and 385 yards, there’s a crowd of people waiting around on the sidelines for at best two hours (if their favorite runner is from Kenya ;), but probably more like 4 or 5 hours.

That’s a long time to stand around watching people moaning in pain while they shuffle along the street, leaving behind a wide swath of sweat on the asphalt. The very first guy to run a marathon in 490 BC reportedly died. For the love of Mike your nipples bleed if you don’t take precautions against chafing! Gah!

A baseball game also involves hanging around for a few hours, either in uncomfortable seating at the park or on your couch at home, multiplied by however many games you pay attention to. With the average length of a game at 2:45, you could rack up over 445 hours if you watched every minute of every game. Not to mention achieving the gluteal equivalent of bed sores.

Another baseball axiom is that winning cures all ills. It’s so much easier to keep watching game after game if your team is winning most of them — the same thing is true, even more so, if you’re playing them. Lately, it’s been much harder to want to watch Dodger games. This past Monday’s debut of knuckleballer Charlie Haegar was the first time in a while that I was actually looking forward excitedly to see a Dodger game. Naturally, they lost.

So starting pitchers are dropping like flies, the Rockies and Giants are worryingly not going away, and I issue a plaintive sigh whenever somebody asks how the Dodgers are doing.

There is another baseball truism that applies however, even if the “it’s still early” denial won’t work anymore:

Don’t get too high or too low.

As easy as it would be to descend into the depths of depressive fatalism, the Dodgers are still in first place by a few games. They are not being blown out and are a few breaks one way or another to being undefeated in the last 10 games. While they are struggling against elite pitching, everybody struggles against elite pitching — that’s why they’re elite.

During the halcyon days of pre-Mannygate, not to mention during the suspension when the Dodgers seemingly couldn’t lose, I had to remind myself not too get too elated or too prideful. “It’s still early” swings both ways.

In the best of times, don’t get too high. And in the worst of times, don’t get too low.

It’ll work out somehow. I have faith in this crazily talented team that they will struggle their way out of the doldrums and get hot at exactly the right time — going into the playoffs.

And hey, at least our nipples aren’t bleeding!

Let me refresh your memory:

The citizens showed up early in hopes that the mayor would come out early to greet them.

He didn’t.

The citizens began cheering as he ran out for the start of the game in hopes that the mayor would acknowledge them.

He wouldn’t.

The citizens chanted his name as he finished his first warm-up tosses in hopes that the mayor would at least throw them the ball.

He threw it in the left-field stands instead.

After blowing off honesty, accountability and one-third of the season, Manny Ramirez did something more egregious in his return to Dodger Stadium on Thursday.

He blew off Mannywood.

In the first inning of his first appearance in a left-field corner adorned with the “Mannywood 99″ banner and filled with hundreds of loving fans who paid a premium for their proximity, Ramirez acted as if none of it existed.

Talk about splitting hairs. Of course, you don’t have a bias about this story, do you, Bill?

No, of course you don’t.

Trying to spin his first appearance back in left field like he blew off his fans (the “official” Mannywood or not) is just wrong.

Stick with the mascots, Bill. I think you found your calling in Lake Elsinore.

Update: I missed Mike Scioscia’s Tragic Illness catching this on Friday. I enjoyed their post title: “Bill Plaschke Lies to You and Hates Dodger Stadium”. :)

The stuff he writes when he does attend has so little to do with what’s going on down on the field that there’s really no point in him being there. (Unless it’s for the free press box Dodger Dogs.) If he insists on “covering” the team, he might well just stay home.

From Manny Ramirez’s statement released on May 7th:

“Recently I saw a physician for a personal health issue. He gave me a medication, not a steroid, which he thought was okay to give me. Unfortunately, the medication was banned under our drug policy. Under the policy that mistake is now my responsibility. I have been advised not to say anything more for now. I do want to say one other thing; I’ve taken and passed about 15 drug tests over the past five seasons.

“I want to apologize to Mr. McCourt, Mrs. McCourt, Mr. Torre, my teammates, the Dodger organization, and to the Dodger fans. LA is a special place to me and I know everybody is disappointed. So am I. I’m sorry about this whole situation.“

Just sayin’.

The first thing we noticed after getting parked was a more pronounced police presence than usual.

There were also cops and security personnel cruising around the stadium. But that’s to be expected when you get a world-famous athlete playing in your park. We didn’t see anything untoward going on, apart from one fight in the 4th inning that was quickly squelched, so it seemed to be working.

It was noticeably more crowded getting around the entrance and food vendor areas, although I’ve seen it similarly crowded on big promotion nights or holidays.

While waiting in line for our first Dodger Dog and local Hangar 24 beer, we caught a couple readying themselves for the game with a final dreadlocks adjustment.

There were a ton of the Manny dreadlocks wigs being worn, including by Bernie, the 66ers’ mascot (see below).

Once we got seated, this gentleman was good enough to stand in front and remind us of why we were all there. ;)

A crowd was standing at the third-base-side railing trying to strain for a view into the dugout. When Manny made his first appearance, running onto the fields for warmups, he also got the first of several ovations of the night. Somebody even broke out a beach ball for the occasion, just like at Dodger Stadium. :)

Partway through warmups, Manny jogged over to the railing and signed autographs in the middle of this mob.

Big cheers for Manny’s introduction and him running on the field. No boos were heard anywhere near us. A few were reserved for San Bernardino Mayor Pat Morris, who threw out the first pitch. ;)

Much like a pro soccer game, the players were accompanied onto the field by kids. Here’s Manny with a couple of children and 66ers mascot Bernie.

Bernie also engaged in a bit of pre-game meditation on the third-base line.

I’m a sucker for mascots, especially talented ones. Bernie has some great routines, and the kids adore him. Here he is rocking the dreadlocks and the cowbell.

In Manny’s first at-bat, batting leadoff, he drew a walk from the understandably nervous Rancho Cucamonga Quakes pitcher, Alex Torres. The starter settled down, later striking Manny out twice.

After the walk, Manny went from first to third on a double by DH Elian Herrera, but was stranded there.

Winner for best headgear of the night was this fellow, with a Dodger cap atop his sombrero.

Manny had a pretty good average thanks to the home run the night before. Kind of surreal seeing his name out there on the old scoreboard.

Shouts of “Manny!” and “I love you, Manny!” and “Hey, Manuelito!” as he came off the field. Cellphone cameras filled up with pictures.

Preston Mattingly, son of Dodger pitching coach Don Mattingly, pinch-hit for Manny in the 6th inning, then stayed in at LF for the 7th and the rest of the game — which, by the way, the 66ers won, 4-1, after a great eight innings by starter Timothy Sexton.

Manny’s name at the top of the lineup board. All of those guys will have quite a story to tell, no matter how far they go in their baseball careers. I wonder who will be making it to the bigs someday.

Here’s the starting lineup transcribed (see box score):

• LF Manny Ramirez
• DH Elian Herrera
• CF Trayvon Robinson
• 3B Pedro Baez
• 1B Steven Caseres
• RF Scott Van Slyke
• 2B Adolfo Gonzalez
• C Alex Garabedian
• SS Christian Lara
• P Timothy Sexton

I imagine writing that name on the board must have been fun. :)

Lastly is this sign located just outside the entrance, with mileage to the various Dodger facilities around the US and Caribbean. If only we knew what units the distance to Albuquerque were in! ;)

A few other articles and related whatnot about the night:

• ie66ers.com: “Ramirez causes stir in San Bernardino”
• ie66ers.com: “Sexton Steals Spotlight from Manny”
• mlb.com: “Quiet night for Manny with Inland Empire”
• San Bernardino Sun: “Dodger fans flock to see Ramirez”
• San Bernardino Sun: Photo gallery
• LA Times: “Manny Ramirez’s minor league tour coming to end”
• Manny’s minorleaguebaseball.com page
• Box Score

Keep in mind:

The 66ers would also like to remind fans that the media reports concerning Manny Ramirez’s rehab appearance with the 66ers has not been confirmed by the Dodgers as of Friday morning. Major League players’ rehab schedules are subject to change, so the team cannot confirm or guarantee that Ramirez will be playing on those days. Both Sunday and Monday games are currently SOLD OUT, however the 66ers have created special ticket options for the two games. Tickets for Tuesday’s 11 a.m. game are still available.

They have a new $25 BBQ Picnic Ticket option:

The BBQ Picnic Tickets include an all-you-can-eat food buffet of hamburgers, hot dogs, BBQ chicken, baked beans, potato salad, chips and cookies. Soda and water are also available at the buffet. The tickets will include a wristband for admission to the 1st base patio area for the buffet, which will be open from 5:30 p.m. to 7 p.m. on Sunday and 6:30 p.m. to 8 p.m. on Monday. The seating area for the BBQ Picnic Tickets is in the 1st base patio area, and there are no assigned seats in this area. These tickets must be purchased in advance at the 66ers box office while they are still available.

Fans will receive one (1) wristband per ticket purchased, and fans must have their bracelet to enter the patio area. There will be a $25 replacement fee for all lost wristbands. The 66ers encourage fans purchasing BBQ Picnic Tickets to give themselves extra time getting to the stadium, parking and getting into the ballpark. Long lines and large crowds are expected for both games, so please plan accordingly.

As Los Angeles Dodgers outfielder Manny Ramirez nears the end of his 50-game suspension, Drug Enforcement Administration investigators are looking at a Miami doctor and his son as the source of his banned performance-enhancing drug, sources familiar with the investigation told ESPN.

There was a steady stream of ticket buyers coming up to the windows at Arrowhead Credit Union Stadium in downtown San Bernardino this morning when I stopped by. I poked my head in to the office and confirmed with a front desk person that there had been a swing upwards in ticket sales this morning.

I’m guessing tickets will still be available until there is more confirmation about dates, but of course at this point there’s no telling for sure.

If this does turn out to be a Manny-splendored game, I’ll naturally be posting pictures and audio afterwards — during, if I can get it worked out.