The Trolley Dodger

Following up on the recent Steve Lopez post, “How to generate hits in these troubled times”, Lopez announced his tickets were going to be awarded to a local firefighter. Of course. The winning entry:

“Dear Manny,” wrote Richard MacPhee, “I am a firefighter for the USFS, I make $16 an hour. It’s hot, dirty, dangerous, with long hours. My body hurts all the time. It takes four years to make $170,000. My bonus, somebody telling me ‘Thanks for the hard work.’ You should try it some time.”

No offense to Mr. MacPhee, and thanks to him for his service, but I’ll bet Lopez makes quite a bit more than $16 an hour for doing less physically taxing labor than a member of the Dodger marketing department, much less Manny Ramirez, and whose greatest claim to fame is writing and selling somebody else’s story. As Jon Weisman pointed out,

Ramirez might well loaf from time to time, but overall his work ethic is pretty legendary. I’m not saying that to whitewash the mistakes he has made. But there is no shortage of stories about the effort he has put into the game. He did not float to the top of the baseball echelon. He’s no firefighter, but if Ramirez doesn’t work as hard as MacPhee, he still has worked plenty hard.

Barring some unlikely direct reply from Lopez, I’m letting this go for now — I’m looking forward to Game 1 tomorrow and would rather concentrate on the positives of this entire team and their amazing season. Something I wish Lopez had done himself.

Not even the hometown newspaper picked them to win. Congratulations to the Dodgers sweeping the Cardinals.

We’re excited here at Trolley Dodger HQ, but it is as subdued as the on-field celebration at Busch Stadium just now. This is only step one.

1. Pick a topic that will cause controversy. Say, Manny Ramirez’s drug suspension.
2. Come up with a gimmick to bring in the links and hits. Say, “…I’m giving my World Series tickets this year to the person who writes my favorite 50-word sermon to Ramirez.”
3. Get Bill Plaschke to ghost-write your column for you.
4. Edit Bill’s first draft to increase the moral indignation and delete some of the carriage returns.
5. Publish column and watch the hits roll in.

I would expect more out of Steve Lopez. Unfortunately, he decided to take the easy way out. Loafing his way across the outfield, as it were.

Maybe it’s the vicodin talking, but this whole scheme strikes me as insincere. If you felt that bad about buying those tickets (and somehow calculating you were supporting Manny by doing so), how about donating those tainted tickets to be auctioned off for charity? You could even make it a steroid-awareness organization if you felt like making a real statement.

Think about how much of a bigger splash you could have made by doing things that way. You’d get all kinds of press online and in the real world. Plus you’d be making a difference about a cause that you apparently care a lot about. And getting even more of those precious hits and links.

Something to mull over in the next columnist meeting.

Thank goodness Bill Plaschke has been distracted by the Lakers playoffs this past week. Let’s hope the Lakers go all the way, if for no other reason than to keep him preoccupied and away from Dodger Stadium.

For those just tuning in, Plaschke submitted a diatribe 10 days ago, in which he lambasted Dodger fans for getting on with their lives without Manny Ramirez, calling them no better than San Francisco Giants followers. Them’s fightin’ words.

Today came an article by Randy Cohen in the NY Times, “Is Manny Ramirez Really All That Bad?”, in which the reverse of Plaschke’s “tar and feathering isn’t good enough for Manny” argument is opined:

If we admire athletes who work hard to improve their play, then why do we damn those who do just that with the use of banned substances?

Fellow commenter “Hollywood Joe” and I got into a conversation about that piece in this thread on Dodger Thoughts. My take is that Cohen skirts around what to me is the core issue — taking PEDs is against the rules of baseball. And moreover, it’s rude. :) I wrote,

Baseball is an all-too human activity masquerading (at least for some folks in the fourth estate) as a religion. The imperfect human story is always more entertaining than the flawless saint’s. If every game pitched were perfect or every hit a home run, then it ceases to be interesting. This is why I don’t play sports video games on rookie mode once I’m used to the controls.

This is also why gaining an advantage via an activity that is against the rules sullies the game, at least to me. It becomes a less entertaining game, even if the subject itself is more interesting. Cheat codes are maybe fun once or twice, to continue the metaphor, but making a habit of them while playing with friends is unsporting.

Now, this doesn’t mean that I enjoy baseball less because of the rampant PED usage. The sport is more than just the game, and the reasons to watch it are more complicated than just faceless automatons throwing, catching, and hitting mechanically.

It’s the human side that adds depth to watching sports. Otherwise, you might as well just flip a coin and be done with it. The stories are what keep me entertained over the course of a long season. Not a soap opera, but the drama of a marathon grind.

Will Matt Kemp, Andre Ethier, and the other “kids” continue their maturation into the ballplayers we think they can be?

Will the pitching staff keep it together with Hiroki Kuroda out, or will they fold under the pressure?

Does Jonathan Broxton have what it takes to be a closer?

Will Manny Ramirez be himself when he returns in July?

Can the team go all the way this year and erase 21 years of futility?

I continued in my comments,

To use an ESPN favorite, Derek Jeter’s “classiness” is much less of a big deal without A-Rod’s soap opera on the team as a counterpoint. :)

Doesn’t mean I condone A-Rod’s behavior — I don’t get why, with his innate talents, he felt the need to get even more of an advantage. And that question makes him way more fascinating of a character than the manufactured facade he worked so hard to maintain.

And none of this requires burning him, Manny, Clemens, Sosa, McGwire, or Bonds at the stake. People like Plaschke who are seemingly more interested in making sure they get back on “Around the Horn” are worse for baseball than Manny or A-Rod.

As a postscript, I feel as if I should reiterate what I said in my 5/9 post: I like Bill Plaschke. When he’s on, he can be a great sportswriter who shines a light on that human drama like few others in his field.

Let’s hope the Lakers keep him busy for a while.

Eric Stults pitches a beauty of a complete game today, a mere four hits away from a perfect game. Juan Pierre steps in and offers some hope for left field. Matt Kemp continues to show the faith in his future abilities is both well founded and no longer in the future.

All that, and what does Bill Plaschke carriage-return about today?

He uses his page-one pulpit to complain about Dodgers fans getting on with life sans Manny.

He berates them for being supportive of a beloved player who made a stupid mistake, one for which he is paying both a literal and figurative price.

He insults an entire fanbase, millions of people, for choosing sanity not insanity.

I mean, there aren’t very many worse insults than to say Los Angeles citizens are sullen San Francisco denizens, that supporting Manny is the moral equivalent of cheering Barry Bonds. Or kicking puppies.

The problem is, Plaschke has missed the point. Again. Check this out:

Fully two-thirds of the approximately 750 e-mails I have received about Manny Ramirez have ripped me for criticizing him.

No, they are ripping you for saying the rules should be broken to prove your crusading point. The owners and the players union (finally) agreed to severe penalties in case of pharmaceutical infractions. Manny is paying the penalty right now.

Bill, you want to throw all that away. You’re saying the rules should be broken because Manny broke the rules. That he should be kicked off the Dodgers (which can’t happen anyhow) for making a mistake. That he should be banned from baseball.

The fact is that if a big name like Manny Ramirez gets caught and suspended for 50 games, the system is working. If you destroy the system, which is what you are apoplectically advocating right now, then you will destroy baseball.

Bill, you are acting like a self-serving, sanctimonious jerk right now who is more concerned with driving web traffic to your articles and eyeballs to Around the Horn than with what’s best for the Dodgers, Los Angeles, or the fans. I am not going to provide a live link to your current article because of that attitude.

You are better than this. You are a good writer. You don’t need to act this way.

Please stop.